dee.writing » meauw

Hand Job

meauw — Fri, 28 Jul 2006 00:18:03 +0000

A man is sitting at a bar and says to the bar tender, “I’m horny, do you know where I could get some good lovin’?”
The bar tender replies, “Sure upstairs, two doors on the right.”
So the man walks up to the second door on the right and in the middle of the room stood a beautiful hooker.

He asked her, “How much for a hand job?”
The hooker answered, “$25!”
He said in astonishment, “Damn, you must be good for that price!”
The hooker said, “Look outside: see that apartment, I bought that with all of the hand jobs I have given.”

The man paid and got a hand job. When the hooker was done he asked, “How much for a blow job?”
The hooker answered, “$50!”
The man again replied, “Damn, you must be good for that price!”
The hooker stood up and said, “Look outside: see that car, I bought that with all of the blow jobs I have given.”
So the man again paid and got his blow job.

When the hooker was done he asked, “How much for a little pussy?”
The hooker stood up once again looking outside and said, “Look outside: see that city, I would own all of that if I HAD a pussy!”

You Got Male!!!

meauw — Fri, 28 Jul 2006 00:15:00 +0000

A little boy goes to his father and asks “Daddy, how was I born?”
The father answers: “Well son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared that said: You got Male.

Chinese Names Annie Wan :-)

meauw — Thu, 27 Jul 2006 06:06:03 +0000

Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan (anyone)?
Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.
Caller : No, I want to speak to Annie Wan (anyone)!
Operator : You are talking to someone! Who is this?

Caller : I’m Sam Wan (Someone). And I need to talk to Annie Wan (anyone)! It’s urgent.
Operator : I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone!
But what’s this urgent matter about?
Caller : Well… just tell my sister Annie Wan (anyone) that our brother Noe Wan (no one) was involved in an accident. Noe Wan (no one) got injured and now Noe Wan (no one) is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan (everyone) is on his way to the hospital.
Operator : Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn’t an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don’t have timefor this!
Caller : You are so rude! Who are you?
Operator : I’m Saw Lee (Sorry).
Caller : Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!

[Well, telephone could kill you !]